Contradictio in Terminis

This is a post all about eighteenth century French literature! Because reading Diderot is just... LOLWUT. But it is not a srs!bznz post because a) LOL THE BOOK IS WRITTEN IN FRENCH, WHAT IS THIS READING COMPREHENSION YOU SPEAK OF? and (consequently), b) my summary of the book is basically as follows: two guys ride around and talk about their sexcapades.

I REALLY ENJOYED THIS BOOK. :DDDDDD

Let the record show that: 1) If I am looking up fanfiction for Jacques le fataliste, it is only because DIDEROT TOLD ME TO. Or, rather, he was all "I DARE YOU TO DO BETTER Si vous n'êtes pas satisfait de ce que je vous révèle des amours de Jacques, lecteur, faites mieux, j'y consens." WHICH IS BASICALLY THE SAME THING.

2) "Tu es mon serviteur, quand je suis malade ou bien portant, et je suis le tien quand tu te portes mal." (p.118) ;LASKDJF;LASKDJFAS YOU GUYS WHY IS IT SO ~BROMANTIC ;ASLDKJFA;LSDF (There are other examples, but I am too lazy to type up a whole paragraph of French js.)

3)... THAT IS SOME NICE BROMANCE YOU'VE GOT GOIN' ON THERE, DIDEROT.

Jacques: Bonjour, ladies.
Look at your Maître. Now back to me. Now back à votre Maître. Et encore à moi. Malheureusement, il n'est pas moi. Mais s'il ne prendrait pas une prise de tabac en regardant l'heure qu'il est, he could act like he's me. Look down, back up. Where are you? You're camping in the French countryside with your Maître. What's on your mind? I have it! It's a history of the time I learned sex didn't have to be in the missionary position. Look again. The woman is now on top! Anything is possible si c'est écrit là-haut.
Son Maître: I'm on a horse.

SOMEDAY, I WILL ACCEPT THAT NO ONE APPRECIATES BUTCHERED FRANGLAIS OLD SPICE MEMES*. UNTIL THEN, YOU'LL JUST HAVE TO PUT UP WITH ME.

*Also, why have I not been able to find one for The Eagle? STEP IT UP, FANDOM. :D

Today, I have done: contacted the Community Housing Office. What's that, I might actually have somewhere to live next year? *FINGERS CROSSED*
...am doing: nothing (no, wait, I'm eating KD. The real kind, not the whole wheat crap. *rebel*)
...will do: try to survive the rest of the day on three hours of sleep

ASLDFKJAS;DL DAMMIT. FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU WORK, WHY IS MY SHIFT SCHEDULED DURING ALL THE COOL EVENTS?! Grrr, not only do I have make up dance classes* that day, but I just got an email about "Queer Inquiry at Queen's: Presents advances in queer research and theory made by Queen's faculty in the fields of psychology, gender studies, religion, and law." aka Queen's profs and stuff talking about queer issues** and I want to gooooooooooooo, but I can't. Watch me D-FACE LIKE ZQ.

*Edited because HOLD THE PHONE, lemme tell you how excited I am for the QDC dance recital coming up Mar. 25 - 27. I AM SO EXCITED. EXCITED LIKE YOU HAVE NO IDEA. (cherishedsaulie : You don't understaaaaaaaaaaaand!) Our routines are going to be fucking amazing. Inter Lyrical is going to be like phwoarrrr, except also really random, methinks. IDK, I can't really explain the choreography, but it feels kind of disjointed and bunched, if you get what I mean. Nonetheless, it is dance, and it will be so fantastic.

Maybe not as fantastic as our Beginner Hip Hop routine, though. BECAUSE THAT WILL BE EPIC LIKE NOTHING ELSE. I am determined to make it so (m-m-make it so, m-m-m-make it so). I mean, guys, the basic idea of it is "Frat vs Sorority" (coughLIKETHISFICcough) so it already has a baseline level of fantastic awesome. I'm in the "frat" section and IDEK HOW TO EXPRESS HOW EXCITED I AM FOR THIS. We get to learn cool moves and it looks so boss when our instructor shows us how it's going to work that if it were possible to continuously jizz one's pants for days on end, that's what I'd be doing for this recital.

*looks at last sentence* ...Ahem. Well, now that I've completely turned you off all forms of dance, ever...

TL;DR I CANNOT WAIT FOR THIS RECITAL HOLY CRAP





**Yeah, queer issues at Queen's. Sounds like an oxymoron, no?

AAAAAAHHHHHHHH FUCK IT HAS BEEN TOO LONG, SHOW.

Yeah, also probably spoilers for S5 E1, only this is kind of incoherent capslock, so the warning is pretty mild.
( LIFE AS AN ANGEL'S CONDOM )
akjds;lfjas to be continued fml. I still need to finish up my doomed Health essay.

SHIT. SHIT, GUYS, SHIT. THE ROCK, I LIVE UNDER IT.

GUESS WHAT MY WEEKEND IS: TORCHWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD. OMFFFFFFFFFG APPARENTLY IT'S AWESOME. LIKE, MORESO THAN USUAL. FUCK. I CAN'T WAIT.


OH. MY. GOD. YES. DO WANT. WANT WANT WANT. YAY TORCHWOOD IS BACK AND OMFG THE GAY WILL BE FUCKING TANGIBLE. LOVES.

 A BOMB THREAT? IN MY SCHOOL? IT'S MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK! *points to icon* This exemplifies my feelings perfectly.
( Read more... )

( It's ok to be gay was playing in my head ALL EVENING. I would have sung along, but I felt that might be mildly inappropriate. )

Also, completely random, but anyway, I think that I only get really cold when I'm unhappy about stuff. Case in point, yesterday I felt miserable, and I was wearing my fluffiest pj's, and I was still freezing my ass off. Today, I felt human for the first time in a while, and it was nice and warm.