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bitchy_merlinHOOOOOOOOOOLY CRAP, I JUST FINISHED READING TERRY PRATCHETT'S UNSEEN ACADEMICALS, THE LATEST INSTALLMENT IN HIS DISCWORLD SERIES, AND I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT IT THAT THE MOST COHERENT THOUGHT I CAN MUSTER GOES SOMETHING LIKE THIS:
I ENJOYED THAT BOOK SO MUCH IT MADE ME WANT TO BASH MY HEAD INTO WALLS AND HURL MYSELF BODILY THROUGH WINDOWS. I HAD TO PAUSE AND FLAIL DRAMATICALLY ALONG THE WAY, AND ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS I HAD TO STOP READING AND WHACK MY HEAD REPEATEDLY AGAINST THE BOOK (IT'S HARDCOVER) BECAUSE I WAS NOT PHYSICALLY PREPARED FOR THE AWESOME WITHIN*.
In, as Glenda would say, a pine seed, it had everything I could ever ask for in a Discworld novel. Ankh-Morpork! The Unseen University! REALLY, REALLY AWESOME AND INTERESTING CHARACTERS WHOM I HAVE NEVER MET BEFORE BUT LOVE DEARLY NOW (like Glendaaaaaaaaaa ♥____♥)! SO. MUCH. WIN.
Basically what happens is Ankh-Morpork tries its hand at soccer (ok, fine, football), with the wizards of Unseen University - creatures of habit, more worried about the types of cheese on the snack trolley than a seventy-foot tall chicken on the loose - heading the league. Wacky shenanigans ensue. AWESOME CHARACTERS ARE AWESOME! Especially Juliet, who I didn't think I'd like at first, but who really grew on me. And Trev! I loved Trev and his beautiful tin can as well! Also, I stan Glenda and Nutt to the ends of the universe and back, just sayin'.
But the cameos, oh my God. Like I'd died and gone to heaven. OH MY GOD, THEY CALL THE AMCW "The Old Sam", HOW AWESOME IS THAT? ALL THE AWESOME! :DDDDDDDD VIMES GOT, LIKE, FIVE LINES AT THE END! HE'D BEEN IN KOOM VALLEY! THE ACCORD! BRB SHAKING AND DYING RN. The Lady Sybil Hospital and Doctor Lawn? Almost reduced me to tears of joy. Sergeant Angua being awesome! Constant references to Nobby and CMOT Dibbler and DEATH, fuck yes! Plus, Igor and Igor's sandwiches, which deserve a mention all their own. I am a giant ball of flailing (I don't go gloing!, though.) I love these characters; reading about them again is like catching up with old friends. I can't say it simpler than that.
(Vetinari gets his own paragraph, fyi**.)
So, I might have mentioned that Havelock Vetinari is my favourite character, right after Sam Vimes? Yeah. He appeared a lot. IT WAS FANTASTIC. I looked like this the entire time: 8D. Aftersqueeing over reading the book in its entirety, this is what I have concluded: VETINARI IS A CLOSET HOMOSEXUAL ROMANTIC AND I LOVE IT. But no, let's start with other things first, ie, THE PART WHERE HE GOT SCHMAMMMERED AND *TALKITIVE* AND WAS STILL ABLE TO ALMOST INCAPACITATE A RANDOM DUDE AND RUN A FUCKING CITY. I LOVE THIS MAN SO MUCH. Also, the other mentions of him by other people, like how he punishes murderers - especially those whose targets are members of the Watch. ♥_______________________________♥ Not enough love and fangirly squee in the world to express my joy. (And speaking of fangirls, I kind of adore the scene at the football captains' banquet where Glenda is talking to a wine waiter about Vetinari and this happens: "'Oh, yeah, the ladies like him,' said the waiter and sniffed" (p.234). It's a lovely little shout out to the fact that, as noted in The Art of Discworld, Vetinari has his own all-female fan club. *g* It's the little things.) Speaking even more of fangirls, how about Lady Margolotta? FOR THE MFING WIN Y/Y? I love their snark and their "dot dot dot relationship" and how he was totally smug when Glenda stared her down. I also jizzed my metaphorical pants (or perhaps, metaphorically jizzed in my pants) at the end when Vetinari honest-to-God laughed, a real laugh, like it just burst forth out of nowhere and he wasn't expecting it - it just happened. I thought it was a particularly telling sentence that the Patrician/Tyrant of Ankh-Morpork only really lets himself go - well, inasmuch as he ever does - in her immediate presence. It's kind of wonderful.
(PS: LOL forever at Lady Margolotta's brimstone rubber-and-leather dress. O HAI VETINARI, DID IT LOOK GOOD ON YOUR FLOOR?)
What I really loved about this book, though, (aside from the blatant Vetinari appearances throughout) was that I felt like it tied up a lot of loose ends from previous books. Vetinari and Margolotta for instance, as well as the KV Accord. Doctor Lawn and the Lady Sybil Hospital a;lskdjf;asdkjf;, yes! Rincewind and the luggage! And don't forget Ponder Stibbons and Ridcully, oh man. AND RIDCULLY MEETING WITH VETINARI, HOW AWESOME WAS THAT? ANSWER: NOT AS AWESOME AS GLENDA HAVING IT OUT WITH HIM! ILU GLENDA! YOU GO, GIRL~
I am just, I am stupidly overwhelmed by this book; I love the Discworld series and all of PTerry's wonderful characters so much it's almost painful. I know that with Alzheimer's, PTerry won't be churning out novels left, right and center anymore, which is why I'm glad, so glad, that this book is as enjoyable as it is. If this has to be his final Discworld novel, then it's the one for me. I don't mean to say goodbye to Discworld - because I can't, how could I? - but if Unseen Academicals is the last published novel about it, somehow, I'd benot quite as desperately heartbroken as I could have been ok with it. It has an exceptionally well turned-out cast of characters (ok, maybe no one from Lancre, but Brother Oats and Forgiveness are totally mentioned!) and it's an all-round great fun read. It is a perfect - not ending, per se, because Discworld doesn't end, but it gives a perfect type of closure to the series. It is, at heart, everything I love about Discworld and PTerry's writing in one book, and to me, that makes it wonderful. ♥
*I am sure there are other people who respond to above-average levels of excitement in the same way I do. I just haven't met them yet.
**This paragraph is also technically a Tyranny.
I ENJOYED THAT BOOK SO MUCH IT MADE ME WANT TO BASH MY HEAD INTO WALLS AND HURL MYSELF BODILY THROUGH WINDOWS. I HAD TO PAUSE AND FLAIL DRAMATICALLY ALONG THE WAY, AND ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS I HAD TO STOP READING AND WHACK MY HEAD REPEATEDLY AGAINST THE BOOK (IT'S HARDCOVER) BECAUSE I WAS NOT PHYSICALLY PREPARED FOR THE AWESOME WITHIN*.
In, as Glenda would say, a pine seed, it had everything I could ever ask for in a Discworld novel. Ankh-Morpork! The Unseen University! REALLY, REALLY AWESOME AND INTERESTING CHARACTERS WHOM I HAVE NEVER MET BEFORE BUT LOVE DEARLY NOW (like Glendaaaaaaaaaa ♥____♥)! SO. MUCH. WIN.
Basically what happens is Ankh-Morpork tries its hand at soccer (ok, fine, football), with the wizards of Unseen University - creatures of habit, more worried about the types of cheese on the snack trolley than a seventy-foot tall chicken on the loose - heading the league. Wacky shenanigans ensue. AWESOME CHARACTERS ARE AWESOME! Especially Juliet, who I didn't think I'd like at first, but who really grew on me. And Trev! I loved Trev and his beautiful tin can as well! Also, I stan Glenda and Nutt to the ends of the universe and back, just sayin'.
But the cameos, oh my God. Like I'd died and gone to heaven. OH MY GOD, THEY CALL THE AMCW "The Old Sam", HOW AWESOME IS THAT? ALL THE AWESOME! :DDDDDDDD VIMES GOT, LIKE, FIVE LINES AT THE END! HE'D BEEN IN KOOM VALLEY! THE ACCORD! BRB SHAKING AND DYING RN. The Lady Sybil Hospital and Doctor Lawn? Almost reduced me to tears of joy. Sergeant Angua being awesome! Constant references to Nobby and CMOT Dibbler and DEATH, fuck yes! Plus, Igor and Igor's sandwiches, which deserve a mention all their own. I am a giant ball of flailing (I don't go gloing!, though.) I love these characters; reading about them again is like catching up with old friends. I can't say it simpler than that.
(Vetinari gets his own paragraph, fyi**.)
So, I might have mentioned that Havelock Vetinari is my favourite character, right after Sam Vimes? Yeah. He appeared a lot. IT WAS FANTASTIC. I looked like this the entire time: 8D. After
(PS: LOL forever at Lady Margolotta's brimstone rubber-and-leather dress. O HAI VETINARI, DID IT LOOK GOOD ON YOUR FLOOR?)
What I really loved about this book, though, (aside from the blatant Vetinari appearances throughout) was that I felt like it tied up a lot of loose ends from previous books. Vetinari and Margolotta for instance, as well as the KV Accord. Doctor Lawn and the Lady Sybil Hospital a;lskdjf;asdkjf;, yes! Rincewind and the luggage! And don't forget Ponder Stibbons and Ridcully, oh man. AND RIDCULLY MEETING WITH VETINARI, HOW AWESOME WAS THAT? ANSWER: NOT AS AWESOME AS GLENDA HAVING IT OUT WITH HIM! ILU GLENDA! YOU GO, GIRL~
I am just, I am stupidly overwhelmed by this book; I love the Discworld series and all of PTerry's wonderful characters so much it's almost painful. I know that with Alzheimer's, PTerry won't be churning out novels left, right and center anymore, which is why I'm glad, so glad, that this book is as enjoyable as it is. If this has to be his final Discworld novel, then it's the one for me. I don't mean to say goodbye to Discworld - because I can't, how could I? - but if Unseen Academicals is the last published novel about it, somehow, I'd be
*I am sure there are other people who respond to above-average levels of excitement in the same way I do. I just haven't met them yet.
**This paragraph is also technically a Tyranny.
