What's that, you say? The first weekend back on campus, you say? Too many self-destructive feelings right now, you say?

I have razorblades in my room? Okay.

...

I definitely did not mean to do that. OOPS.
(But after all this, what's one more scar?)
Exams: 3/5*

Dear body:

WHAT WHAT WHAT ARE YOU DOING. Stop dying on me! Exams aren't done yet, you cannot keep collapsing all over the place halfway through the day. I require the ability to complete sentences until Thursday at 5pm! I have to study like a mofo for French and Biopsyc, and that is dependent upon your ability to continuously maintain adequate muscle tension and to actually concentrate for more than 30 seconds at a time! This zoning out business has got to stop.

No love,
Sarah

a;sdlfjasdklf I am going to fail all the things. I am panicking now, but I cannot concentrate enough to study, which is new and unsettling. Thoughts start forming in my mind and then before I can complete them, they get obscured by white noise. So dumb.

As long as I can make it til Thursday, all will be forgiven.

*Exams I have a shot at passing: 0/5
SELF-IMPOSED 24-HOUR INTERNET* BAN STARTS AT 9:30PM THURSDAY, MARCH 31ST. Because I cannot afford to let my marks slip at all this term, and I have just spent two hours doing nothing when I should have had the second paragraph of my essay written, and I feel like scum.

*Exceptions: checking email in class is fine, because Friday's lecture is just Dr. B's Really Fascinating Life History (aka not something I need to worry about for the final). Also, anything related to research for my lab report/said essay. BUT THAT'S IT.
Exam angst: Boring!  )

OKAY, HAVE MADE A TENTATIVE STUDY SCHEDULE. OMG OMG OMG PANIC.

There should just be, like, a general freakout post somehwhere, where everyone just goes anon and FREAKS THE FUCK OUT about random shit, and then feels better about it and goes on with their day. But I'm going to try and be really good and not post whiny things for the next week (except next Saturday, because that is stats, and I do not think there is a universe in existence where Sarah does not Whine About Stats).

Unit 3

Mar. 5th, 2010 10:53 pm
Dear hormones:

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Sincerely,
Sarah
housing angst- ;ALSKDJF SHUT UP DRUNK PERSON YOU CANNOT SING AGH )

Neal Caffrey, please ameliorate my existence with your awesome!
DAMMIT.

DAMMIT.

I know crying is stupid but oh my God, Canada, why?


Wow, it's taken me too long to do this
Last night went wrong in just about every possible way.

she takes a whiskey drink, she takes a vodka drink, she makes a royal idiot of herself. Mentions of vomit and alcohol and idiocy, please don't click if you find any of that disturbing )

TL;DR: OH MY GOD, I CANNOT HOLD MY LIQUOR AND THAT'S SO EMBARRASSING
Okay, the situation has congealed into this:

OHGODOHGODOHGOD i'm going to die i'm going to die i'mgoingtodiei'mgoingtodiediediediediediedie failfailfailfailfailfailfailfail and die! And then my parents are going to find out I'm doing horribly wtih this fancy education and they're going to kill me. ;alskdjfial;erna I cannot continue procrastinating in this manner! Tonight has been an unfortunate example of that, though it's not even 11 yet. But. I just finished - for a given value of "finished" - my french100 essay - for a given value of "essay" - and it is probably the crappiest thing I've ever written, including the Goldberg thing. Which, you know, is saying something. D:< augh, how could I have been so dumb to leave it to last night? I know it takes me forever to get shit done. Epic fail, self.

I need an 80% average.

And tomorrow night shall mark the commencement of studying for December exams, probably by attempting to get through the required reading - which I shouldn't be three chapters behind in - for psyc. Dammit. Christmas break better be fucking awesome.

(As Nobby Nobbs said: "Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than to curse the darkness.")
Pfffff.... time management, who needs that? I mean, it's not like I have anything better to do with my time than post about my life, right?

*facepalm*



Y'know what would be useful? A trial run at life, so you could go back and be all "ok, well, I messed up here, here, and here; I'll really go for it this time and fix my mistakes". I can dream. Speaking of which, I had a nightmare about pickles the other night. Swear to God, creepiest thing I ever saw. *shudders* I knew I hated pickles for a reason.

...Also, if this is true... part SQUICK, part OMFG THAT IS SO AWESOME, SCIENCE RULES! "Excuse me, Ms. Jones, could you open your mouth a bit wider? Your appendix is slightly larger than expected. Don't worry, this procedure includes complementary mouthwash..." Ok, tasteless jokes over with.
EPIC FAIL. D-:

Dorkorific's journal has been hacked. So has the Shoebox_Project comm. All the entries are gone.

FAILURE.

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bitchy_merlin

March 2017

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